I remember sitting in the congregation of a church and listening to a first lady speak on what God has done and how she lives how she lives. Because of my lack of understanding and know how to apply what was being taught, I became envious and jealous. I wanted the life God had for me but really didn't know to obtain it. Sure people would tell me to pray, attend church, read your bible, but I'd venture say "there has to be more to it." Later on I began to seek God for myself. I became to unfulfilled and desperate for change until I was willing to do whatever it took. Not that I recommend this, but I stop going to church for a while and begin to ask God to show me what to do. I wanted the true essence of myself not anyone else's life.

He became to purge and cleanse me of things that were hindering my progression in His purpose for my life. And here I was thinking it had all to do with what I was learning and what was taking place on the outside. Not that I ever thought I was perfect but I didn't realize the amount of baggage that was weighing me down. It took a lot of work, pain, and tears to get me to where I am today. No, I'm in no way perfect but I am well on to who God has purpose me to be.