It's not to make you miserable or to make your life seem as it's unbearable
It's not to put you to shame or to even make you feel you want to
die
It's to build character, resilience, and courage
It's to build your faith come what may
It's to help you stand flat foot in the face of fear and declare "I SHALL LIVE AND NOT DIE"

It's to allow you to be a living witness that others can make it through
It's to honor and glorify the God who got you through it all

It's to help you come to know and serve the God who's greater than anything
It's to make your praise and worship as natural as each breath you take
It's to get you to your place of destiny and purpose, realizing that it was ALL worth it.

S. R. Howard on the purpose of pain and healing

I AM a person with BIG DREAMS! And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. #notetoself #destin4grtness

DENIAL of a situation doesn't make it go away. Sooner or later you'll have to deal with it or it will deal with you. #stoplyingtoyourself

LISTEN CAREFULLY~You can change your mind, clothes, hair, address, even the milege on your car (although illegal) but YOU CANNOT CANNOT CHANGE PEOPLE! You just may have a better chance at winning the lottery.

#yougonelearn #improvingthehumanexperience

Love is relative to one's experience. You should open your mind more, and that doesn't mean go against the word or what you believe. I study people as a hobby LOL...and one thing I've learned it that each has his/her own experience. It's not safe to assume anything and it's definitely not safe to put people in a box especially when you don't know them. Who knows if you took the time to get to know a lady, without letting your past experiences be at the forefront, you may find that at the core you both are more alike than different.

LOVE is patient and so is PURPOSE. So those of us who are PURPOSE minded don't mind patiently waiting for "LOVE with a PURPOSE." #butnottoolong

It's amazing but I'm realizing keeping my mouth shut on a lot of things my just be about of my destiny also. Revelation is a good thing!

It's amazing when on its own the human spirit is hard headed. One of the biggest lessons I've learned while developing a relationship with God is He's not an enabler. It's true God can do any and all things but there are many things we can physically do for ourselves. We can commission His Spirit to aid us in a task but it's against the word of God to idly sit by and do nothing. Having pity parties and wanting people to feel sorry for us all the time. There's a thin line between being an enabler and a helper.

Partcipating in strife, confusion, and disorder will only render you the same. There is no way possible for you to live this way and have a prosperous and peaceful life. As long as you do what you've always done, you'll continue to get what you've always gotten. It's all up to you.

S. R. Howard on change begins with you

If I had something special in store for you but you never talked to or communicated with me in anyway, how would you know? Well that's exactly how it is with God. Many of us spend the majority of our lives hopelessly wondering the who, what, when , how, and why of it all, when all we have to do is begin to develop a relationship with the all mighty all knowing God. Sure you could hear it from others but something this intimate and special should come straight from the source. Don't spend another minute wondering why you are hear and what you should be doing. It's been said, if you want to know the purpose of a thing, you should ask the creator of that thing. And it may not be given to you all at once but step by step the Holy Spirit will guide you into your truth. The sooner you started the sooner you'll get to the other side.

S. R: Howard you are here for a reason

I will love, support, encourage, and even protect and defend to the best of my ability but I will not enable.

Being the type of person who loves to travel, explore, and be married, it's been hard to sit by and watch people I know do things I long to do. I thank God that I've gotten to the place were I no longer wish for someone else's life. I'm confident so in God's plan and purpose for me that I know that He is working it all out. He knows my dreams and the desires of my heart. I delight myself in Him, so I know I will receive them. Getting to this place wasn't easy but I now realize it was well worth it. There are better days ahead.

S R Howard on what God has for me is still for me

The word of God tells us to not be unequally yoked, so why do some many of us singles struggle with this. I think it's because of the confusion and discontentment that usually sets in when you're my age and it hasn't happened yet. "Lord will I ever be married?" is a question I often ask myself. Yes I desire to be married and I feel that it's a part of my purpose.  During a discussion with fellow single Christians concerning this one stated that a young lady had asked if was wrong to marry a Muslim, he's a good person and treats her really well. I can understand why a Christian would have this question. When we so many divorces in the Christian community and not to mention the adultery and abuse at the hand of pastors against their wives. Many have married just because a they were both Christians while overlooking the nasty attitude, being poor with finances, unable to get along with anyone, but he/she attends church every Sunday and many days in between Although I believe  God ordained marriage, He does allow us to chose who we want to love and enter into covenant with. And no two people of different faiths will be able to live peaceably in the same house . So before making your choice, pray, fast, ask God to help you to see who this person really is, do they fit the journey that is before you.

We must always be open to learn. Even when we think we've "arrived" we still haven't. I've been told that I'm too hard on men and people in general but that's not so. I think I didn't really know the level of my compassion for others. I'm learning to display the truth of who I am, give advice when asked or led by the Spirit, and always pray. But when it comes to my mate, we have to be on the same page, not perfect, but living on purpose and willing and continuing to learn and grow.

Thinking about a post from a Facebook friends concerning "church hurt." There are many opinions concerning this matter but I've experienced it first hand. During a time when I now know as depression, not knowing what to do, I stopped going to church for a while. I then joined another church and the "hurt" came again. Finally "God, I need you to help me with this." I was hurting in so many other areas and being hurt by people in the church was that last thing I needed, especially when I came there for healing. What I've learned people and church buildings have their places but the Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit are the ultimate healers. I had put so much trust and faith in people before I learned how to call on God. 

My relationship with God became stronger. Some may not agree, but its what I needed to get where I needed to be. I was so tried of the brokenness in my life. I read my bible, prayed and just talked openly with God, I was able to hear Him without all the other stuff in my head. He began to send people into my life to help me. Those who had the same or similar hurts and brokenness. When people talk to me now and I mention that I hadn't been to church in a while, they don't know what to make of it. Sure, the church family I have now is wonderful, I love them very much, but we need to know God isn't confined to a building.

Realizing that I don't have "the gift of singleness" I began to get serious about getting myself together. Not only does that include spiritually, but physically, emotionally, and financially. It is my desire to be married and I believe that marriage is apart of my destiny. A mate who fits my purpose and me, his. I also had to revise the dreaded "list." While review some of my requirements, the Lord said to be, if you don't be more reasonable you're going to end up alone. Although I believe marriage is ordained by God, He allows us to decide who we want to love.

Irresponsibility and excuses will get you NO WHERE! Start where you are, use what you have, make a move (even if you're not sure of the outcome) and things will start to change. Sit back, make excuses, do nothing, and you will remain in the same state or worse. Don't be envious when others around you are prospering and moving forward. Your life is the sum of the CHOICES YOU MAKE!

S R Howard on getting what you pay for

Realizing that my thoughts towards others haven't been so pure lately, I have some repenting to do. Yes death and life (Proverbs 18:21) are in the power of the tongue but it's also in our thoughts. We are commanded to bring every thought under submission. Meaning I can't go around thinking what I want to about others just because I don't agree with them and how they live their lives. The TRUTH about being judgemental, it's not always an outward expression. Just because you didn't say it, doesn't make it right! 

SR Howard on taming my thoughts

When it comes to S.E.X. following God is the only solution. If he or she is not your spouse then you shouldn't be having S.E.X. with him or her, point blank period. I say this from years of experiencing hurt, turmoil, and the emotional scars of molestation which lead to many years of me being very promiscuous. Not to mention I was never taught properly in the area of sex education as a child. I was told to not have sex with a boy unless he was my boyfriend. So in my mind, if I considered him to be my boyfriend, then sex was okay.   

People need to realize, especially in today's society, fornication doesn't come without emotional scars rather they show up now or later.  Sex was never meant to be casual, if it doesn't kill your body it will definitely kill your spirit.

I remember sitting in the congregation of a church and listening to a first lady speak on what God has done and how she lives how she lives. Because of my lack of understanding and know how to apply what was being taught, I became envious and jealous. I wanted the life God had for me but really didn't know to obtain it. Sure people would tell me to pray, attend church, read your bible, but I'd venture say "there has to be more to it." Later on I began to seek God for myself. I became to unfulfilled and desperate for change until I was willing to do whatever it took. Not that I recommend this, but I stop going to church for a while and begin to ask God to show me what to do. I wanted the true essence of myself not anyone else's life.

He became to purge and cleanse me of things that were hindering my progression in His purpose for my life. And here I was thinking it had all to do with what I was learning and what was taking place on the outside. Not that I ever thought I was perfect but I didn't realize the amount of baggage that was weighing me down. It took a lot of work, pain, and tears to get me to where I am today. No, I'm in no way perfect but I am well on to who God has purpose me to be.

Having the gift of greatness often a lonely place. Not that I purposely isolate myself but many times I don't fit in and get weary of being judged and viewed as "different." I wouldn't trade what God has purposed me to do for anything in the world. I realize that each place I've been in the last few years has been for a reason. It's never easy even though I'm among family and those who are suppose to love me most and love me best.
Thinking back to my childhood, I've always been different. There's nothing that I can or want to do about it. I know that everything I've gone through good and bad is for His purpose. Regardless of my periods of feeling lonely and out of place, I will continue to press toward the mark. Even if I wanted to go back, I couldn't...there's nothing to go back to and I no longer fit that life anyway.

When will we truly learn and believe that everything we do or say renders a return, whether good or bad. No one is responsible for our actions except us. It's funny how we're often so haughty and cocky, when we do what we do and say what we say, but the same "bravery" that was displayed when we did what we did or said what we said, should be the same "bravery" displayed when the consequences arrive. This ain’t something I heard, it’s what I’ve lived and learned! KNOW THIS~NOTHING IN YOUR LIFE WILL CHANGE FOR THE BETTER UNTIL YOU CHANGE FOR THE BETTER...IT'S THE LAW! Happy Monday FB FAM, PEACE!   #improvingthehumanexperience

Lying, scheming, cheating will get you nowhere. It never has and it never will.

One thing I've been pondering lately is how can people settle. I think I know part of the answer, they don't know there's something different available. I have to smother the mindset that everyone has big goals, dreams, and visions as I do. I know we all have our own individual journeys but oh how I wished I could just convince more people to make an attempt at something different. I started to say better, but maybe what I think or feel is better isn’t necessarily better for them.

I'm that girl who loves God, life, and people. I'm purposed to educate, uplift, inspire, change the world!

After going with what I've gone through and not being able to do a lot of the things I've longed to do, it really puzzles my how some people can have resources and opportunity to do a number of things and never do them. I've grown so tired of hearing people make excuses. One thing this experience has taught me is that many times you have to create an opportunity. August 2009 I could barely see my hand in front of my face, but after almost of being stationery, I had to do something. So one day I decided I wanted to do something I hadn't done in months, go to the library. None of my usual drivers were available so what's a girl to do. I got up. crossed the street, and walked to the bus stop. Because I had no depth perception and couldn't tell how far away a vehicle was from me, I should have been afraid. I wasn't at all. I stood at the corner, said a prayer, counted to three, and across the street I went. To some it may sound like a small feat, but to me it was as if I'd climbed Mount Everest. Although I still had many ups and downs for then to now, I count this as the beginning of the making of me. The courageous woman of God I've grown to be.

Thinking back to my first bout with depression, I was suicidal among other things. I didn't understand the things I do know so I had no idea why and where all the pain and hurt was coming from. It wasn't just emotional, it was the worst physical feelings I'd had up until then. I can remember one day standing in the shower crying my eyes out uncontrollably. I tried desperately to explain to people what I was feeling but many didn't understand. Then one day, I decided I'd take a bottle of night time pain medication. I sat on the floor of my bedroom and struggled with the bottle for over 20 minutes until finally I feel asleep. This was about 10 am or so. but when I awoke is was well into the night, maybe even midnight, I don't remember.
I had lost my job and a man whom I thought I couldn't live without told me he was marrying another woman. I can remember going on a job interview the day after that conversation with him, just sitting there but not knowing a thing what was said.

Fast forward to 2009...

Pain is temporary but victory is forever!

One of the most valuable lessons I've learned over the last few years is that I do have control over my thoughts. It's true that a thought or idea may enter your mind, but it doesn't have to stay there. Although there was nothing much I could do about my eyesight and many of the circumstances surrounding me, I realized that I could determine my thought and how things affected me. I've been familiar with 2 Corinthians 10:5 for a long time but it took me all that time to learn how to apply that word.

I love how it reads in the Message...

^3-6 The world is unprincipled. It’s dog-eat-dog out there! The world doesn’t fight fair. But we don’t live or fight our battles that way—never have and never will. The tools of our trade aren’t for marketing or manipulation, but they are for demolishing that entire massively corrupt culture. We use our powerful God-tools for smashing warped philosophies, tearing down barriers erected against the truth of God, fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ. Our tools are ready at hand for clearing the ground of every obstruction and building lives of obedience into maturity.

Right now I'm grateful for self discovery. I no longer have to make excuses for who God says I am, why I believe what I believe, and why I do or don't do what I do.  Ironically, on my way here, I've lost a lot of people and things that I deemed vital to my existence. Not that people and things aren't needed for my journey but letting God help me make those choices has allowed me to make room for that which is necessary for the rest of my journey. I'm not bitter or mad at any of it, for I know that all things work together for my good. With humility and grace, I walk boldly in freedom, love, peace, and truth.

SR Howard on I didn't make this life I just live it

I thank You Father that I'm learning to live beyond my fears and feelings. I am in great expectations for Your plan for my life. I thank You that Your word declares if I delight myself in You, You'll give me my heart's desire. I desire to walk boldly in faith, in the truth of who You are, and who You created me to be. I will meet every challenge and opportunity with the strength I've obtained through You. There's nothing to hard for You, the fact that I'm still here is proof of that. My love for You will never fail. I thank You for Your faithfulness, grace, and mercy especially because I don't deserve it. In Jesus Name Amen!

#straightfromtheheart